Have you ever hit a slump where you feel down on yourself?
All of us go through those periods of self-doubt and low motivation.
In this episode, I'll discuss a few tips to handle those days and get you back on-track in no time!
Use These Tools On The Days When Self-Doubt Sets In and You Feel Blah and Like Giving Up
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When you start a new job/project/business/weight loss/money program, you have a “high”, an excess of optimism. Maybe you’ve psyched yourself up by the new opportunity, watching motivational videos or the reminder of manifesting wealth à la Think and Grow Rich philosophy. You are pumped and ready to become a millionaire/lose 100 pounds/get a huge raise/etc.
Then nothing happens.
You don’t give up. Of course, you knew it would be hard, but hard work does not scare you. In fact, you feel that you were born to hustle. You crave success. Nothing will stop you. You know you have what it takes.
But nothing happens.
You start getting serious about solving the dilemma. You start binge-watching guru videos on YouTube, searching for the golden ticket. Buy their program to discover the easy path to 6-figures/lose all your weight in 10 days/etc. At 3 am, everything looks good.
You keep going. Maybe you invest in a course, a diet program, a resume makeover, or even a consulting session with a pro, or anything you can purchase that psychologically makes you feel like you “bought” a solution. Your optimism strengthens: You are smart and disciplined. You are confident you will succeed. You watch every video and consume every lesson. You listen to what they say and follow or try to follow because it isn’t that easy. You study diligently the method and try to apply it to yourself.
But still nothing happens.
Now you are desperate. Maybe your new boss is losing faith or your savings are running out. Not enough money is coming in or you feel your new job may not last. Red alert. Your plan at work is falling flat. What in the heck is going on? You should be able to do this. Why isn’t it working? This is the moment of frustration. You start thinking “Maybe it just won’t work, and I should do something else.” or even getting down on yourself.
No, no, no, and no. STOP! Don’t quit! Do this instead:
360 Degree View
Look at your challenge from a birds-eye perspective. Figure out where you fit into the big game. Write down the answers to the following questions:
1. How big is the challenge? Are we talking about $1,000 debt or $100,000? Is is 20 lbs or 100 lbs you need to lose? This will help determine the timeline for achieving your goal.
2. Where are you at in the challenge? Just starting or already halfway there? Write down how much you have achieved if you had a bit of success. This will make you feel better. If you are only beginning, look at other success stories of people who were in a similar position as you and how they accomplished it.
3. Do you have a serious program in place to achieve your goals that includes all of the following: Written Materials or System for Your Challenge, Ongoing Access to a Coach or Mentor, and a Support Team? If not, get them now!
4. Are you putting in the effort and giving it 100%? If not, start now! Or figure out where the true problem is, making working with a coach who can help with a mindset change.
5. Is there a major flaw in your goal that is holding you back? Example: A new business owner may want clients and sales but doesn’t have a strong enough Unique Value Proposition or isn’t visible to the clients he or she seeks. A coach or mentor will see it so make sure you are working with one.
Re-Affirm Your True Desires
People pursue goals for one of two reasons:
- Exterior Motives: you got talked into it, not because you truly care, your friends or family is pushing you to do it, or you think it sounds prestigious).
- Internal Motives: you do something because you can’t imagine living without it.
Big difference. Aim for the latter. Don’t try to start something for the wrong reasons. Only when you align your passions with your talents will you succeed long-term and find fulfillment.
Consult with a Pro
Having a coach or mentor means having another person to hold you accountable and help you develop and follow a strategy instead of winging it. Hire an expert in the area you need, such as a career or business coach. There is no heroism in trying to do everything on your own. On the contrary, you become the biggest loser in the end. Presidents, gold medalists, and other world leaders have coaches and advisors. Doesn’t that tell you something about success?
Remember Your Why
One thing I always do with my coaching clients is to write a WHY list. This is the strongest motivator ever. A WHY list details all the reasons you want to succeed at this so badly. I can’t over stress how important this list is. Imagine you are 60. It is the day of your birthday and your significant other and kids or family have organized a big party. Everyone has come to celebrate you. What do they have to celebrate? Have you achieved all that you wanted to? Do you kids say “I’m so proud of you and I can only hope to live up to your achievements.”? Do your kids want to grow up to succeed as you did…or do they say “I hope I never end up like you”? This is what you should picture when your motivation wanes. Build an amazing career to be proud of!
Use the Haters as Motivation
I want you to visualize every single person who mistreated or underestimated you. Maybe they even told you to your face “You” ll never amount to anything.” or they made you feel they were thinking it. How does that make you feel now? Pretty pissed, I should imagine. Use that energy. Let the anger fuel your drive to succeed. Imagine the shock of those haters when you do accomplish your dreams. It feels good, really good. Now go!
Develop a Plan and Follow It With Iron Self-Discipline
Do you think any celebrity, athlete, or successful CEO got there by laziness? Hell no! Hard work and relentless drive are your success tools. But hard work alone will only burn you out; you must have and follow a plan, day in and day out. Work with your coach or mentor to develop and execute one and pursue it as if you were being chased by a monster and it were a matter of life or death. It kind of is.
Find Your Faith
Regardless of your religious beliefs, imagine that a higher power is carrying you. Maybe you call it God or Allah or maybe it is your ancestors sent to help you. Whatever you call it, the universe wants you to succeed. Have faith. Feel that energy. You are not alone. There are invisible forces at work to help you move forward. Listen and feel. There is your extra fuel. Use it.
Retank Your Energy
The mind-body connection is real. I have my most creative ideas away from work. Take nature walks, do physical exercise, travel, and get away from the office routine to revitalize your creativity and drive.
When you feel demotivated, look for activities that will get your adrenaline pumping. Hang glide, ski the black diamond slope, go bungee jumping, race down a steep hill on your mountain bike, go for a motorcycle ride, and more. At the very least, get a trampoline and jump on it to simulate that rush. If you want to be the best leader, live on the edge.
You have a special purpose on this Earth. Each of us does. But not everyone uses it. Many give up too quickly and resolve themselves to a life of mediocrity. It is the highest crime and form of cowardliness. Yet we use drama and distractions to avoid facing the facts. Don’t be one of them. You are better than that. Now go out there and show the world!
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You don't have to do this alone. There are plenty of options for your support. Consult with your doctor if you think you may be clinically depressed. If you are simply at a difficult time in your life, seek out help via therapy or coaching.